life is short…smile while you still have teeth.

360

Phones are better than girlfriends, At least we can switch off.

65

Eat…sleep….regret……repeat.

635

I love my job only when I’m on vacation.

42

You have to be ODD, to be number ONE.

80

When nothing goes right..!! Go left.

416

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.

464

AwesoME ends with ME and Ugly starts with U.

158

Born to express and not to impress.

52

Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork.

223

Just saw the most smartest person when i was in front of the mirror.

63

Someone writes “Urgent Calls Only”. Don’t get it… Are you in the police or ambulance service.?

68

Someone’s status is “Driving” since 5 days. I guess he reached Dubai.

69

God created the sleep, and the devil created an alarm clock.

313

Brain is the best worker,When you can use it

41

God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me

653

Hey,you are reading my status again ?

167

WARNING!! I know karate …..and some other words!!!

61

A broken promise is as good as a lie .

41

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

76

Autocorrect is like that person who just graduated college and think they know everything.

25

Never laugh at your wife's choices... you're one of them .

78

We Live in Generation Where, "Deleting history is more important than creating history "

105

I’m cool but global warming made me hot

104

Error: status unavailable

691

having 1 child makes you a parent having two makes you a referee.

57

Etc= End of thinking Capacity.

375

Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.

281

No guts, no glory, no brain, same story

60

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

86

What happens if a doctor's wife eats an apple a day?

49

Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.

47

Never make eye contact while eating a banana.

60

People that Change Love status after 30 Sec... GF is the Reason

16

70% boy Have GF ,other Have Brain!

98

3 Mistake done by everyone ..Whatsapp,Facebook & GF

19